January 3, 2007

If Wednesday Was a Person, I'd Kick Their Ass

Fun at the Office

I work for a small company - 20 - 30 employees, depending on the time of year. I realize that I'm not going to have the same things as those who work for a large company. There's no gossiping while huddled around the water cooler. We don't have a water cooler. We don't have interoffice email. Well, actually we do, but we find it easier to yell at each other. There aren't committees or boardrooms. We have no copy room, which means no hot repair guy to ogle at. I'm okay with not having these things. But should I really have to run water through a 2" PVC pipe from the sink into the back of the toilet so there's enough water so I can flush?

Believe it or not, that was one of the better parts of my day. How big does a company have to be before I need an assistant? Does anyone know? Is it based on client count? Gross sales? Whether or not the office manager was found under her desk singing Pop Goes the Weasel while trying to poke her jugular vein with a paper clip?

Random Fact About Me

I eat a spoonful of peanut butter almost every day. Peanut butter on a spoon. Creamy peanut butter. On a spoon.

It really doesn't seem that impressive now that I have it typed out.

Church Sign O' The Week

"Never give the devil a ride, he will want to drive."

Oh my god church sign guy! You may find this difficult to believe, but I totally agree with you. I once made the mistake of picking up Satan- he was hitchhiking, it was raining - and you are so right. He wanted to drive. He begged and pleaded with me until I gave in. And the bitch can't drive. In my defense I had no clue that it was Beelzebub. He told me his name was Ralph. How can you not trust a guy whose name is Ralph? Is your name Ralph, church sign guy?

For those of you needing a description of the Evil One so you'll know who he is and won't be taken in by his deceitful tongue, I found
this wonderful website. I especially love how Satan has filthy fingers and he has brains. And colors. Please note that this website hasn't been updated in over 8 years, so Satan may have washed his hands by now, and his colors might be faded just a tad.

That is all.

Take Care,
The Bablatrice - who has discovered that rocking back and forth is very soothing.

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