February 27, 2007

Today's Post Brought to You by the Letter "Kooky"

The lovely Kathleen was kind enough to point me to another crazy Christian. And lemme tell ya, I think this woman might be just a wee bit touched (the crazy Christian, NOT Kathleen). Estrella Benavides claims that god has instructed her to give her house a little more curb appeal, and to do so by painting it as such:

And then god told her to paint her car like dis right here:

I don't know about you, but I'm thinking her god seems like kind of a goofball.

Here's part of the god-message on her garage door:

No one to vote for. A worldwide mafia group (government)by the pig leader Fidel. (Castro) Cuba thru US and other countries r killing:controlling prices.Creating poverty and suffering Hitler did used just Jews. Castro preapprove representatives (even US)who r alienating constitution & rights of poor to use power of pain. Schools are pay to re-codify: denying parenthood to gays & lesbians. Health system creates illness (HIV -cancer) Courts condemn people who have being forced to violate laws.

Um, Estrella sweetie, I don't know who your god is, but it would seem he or she isn't very coherent. Are you sure you're getting the dictation correctly? I know that when I hear imaginary beings talking to me, sometimes I have trouble figuring out what they're saying. Like this one time I thought I heard Bob - that's the name of my imaginary god -anyway, I thought I heard Bob tell me to go chew on a flip-flop. But when I asked him to repeat it, it turns out he was really telling me that my hair was on fire. I know! They don't even sound anything alike. I think it happened because Bob doesn't enunciate so well when he's been drinking, and Bob loves him some sauce. It's a good thing I asked for clarification, huh? Maybe you should try that, or one day your hair might be on fire and instead of putting it out, you'll be sitting there happily munching away on warm-weather footwear.

The San Mateo City Council has now ruled that the messages from the almighty have got to go, or Estrella will be fined $50 dollars a day for as long as her messages are in place. She claims that she's not going to pay and that she trusts that her god will see her through this one. I don't know that I'd be trusting some god who couldn't articulate any better than that. I know Bob's walking a thin line with me right now.

If you ever have the chance to visit San Mateo, I suggest you jump on it. You wanna know why? Because you might be lucky enough to hear Estrella declaring her god-messages from the loudspeaker she has on top of her car. If that's not trip-worthy, I don't know what is.

Take Care,
Babs

7 comments:

  1. Two words

    LOONEY BIRD!

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  2. Looks like the rants of a florid schizophrenic to me. I've seen a zillion of 'em. Start her on some ansipsychotic meds & she'll calm down in no time. Of course then we'll have to find somebody else to make fun. Good thing there are loads more batshit crazies out there just as bad or worse off than she is so the task of finding new ones won't be difficult.

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  3. Carla - Two more words - I agree.

    Sharna - She stated in one of the articles that she doesn't really hear the voices, she just "gets this feeling". And, this woman somehow manages to own 3 houses. Three houses? How the hell does that even happen?

    I think she likes the attention.

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  4. Woohoo! I got credit for finding the batshit crazy religious types! ;-) I think it's hilarious that I found those in the SF paper, a known godless heathen type of place, what with all the gays and perverts.

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  5. Hey Babs,
    I showed this post to my intro psych class this morning. They really dug it and it sparked a lively discussion about delusions and psychoses. Now you get to be all smug that your blog was actually used as a scholarly reference.

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  6. Royce7:56 AM

    I'm thinking her OTHER job is writing e-mail text to get around spam filters, waddya think?

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  7. Sharna - Oh dear god. Should your students really be exposed to such rubbish? Maybe not, but I totally dig that I now have bragging rights to anything scholarly.

    Royce - Sweet Jesus! I think you're right. Her writing is exactly the same.

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