November 2, 2006

The Devil's Music is in 4/4 Time.

Look who made it onto foundmagazine.com That's right. I submitted this a long time ago, and had forgotten about it. Sigh. The things that bring me joy are so simplistic.

In other breaking news, I was organizing my favorites file, and I came across
this website. I have no idea how this got to be in my favorites file. I don't remember ever reading this, nor saving it. It is a Christian fundamentalist's take on good music vs. evil music.

Here's a quote from this website: "The devil is our adversary. He is against us, because he is against God. This is the basis of march music. God has given us wonderful march music, so the devil says, "If that is what God is for, then I’m against it," and the devil puts the accent on a beat opposite from that of march music. Dance music and march music are direct opposites, because their basic beat is the opposite."

So, see people, when I slam Christians, THIS is who I'm slamming. The fundamentalists who have to make everything evil. I think that they're all a bunch of deviants who pop boners whenever they get to think about how "dirty" something is. And, then after masturbating while reading the story of Sodom and Gomorrah, they punish themselves by reading
Chick Tracts and setting themselves on fire, just so they're reminded of just how uncomfortable hell will be.

Speaking of fundamentalists. Who didn't giggle while reading about Ted Haggard, who has been outspoken on the gay-marriage ban, but ironically (and allegedly) likes either taking it or giving it up the ass while hopped up on meth? Now that he's admitted to buying drugs and getting a massage from a gay man, what are his minions going to say?

Oh! I know what they'll say. That Satan must have had a hold on poor, closet-gay Ted because the devil knew that he was doing important work for the Lord. So, he had to tempt Ted with the allure of men's hairy asses and methamphetamine. Which is always a volatile combination.

My prediction is that Ted will be superficially contrite and will beg forgiveness from the church, and the memebers will just stare glassy-eyed at him and agree with everything that he says, because they don't have the balls to think for themselves.

And, for the rest of you who have yet to realize that homosexuality is as natural as heterosexuality - C'mon. Don't you think it's time you let go of the archaic notion that gayness is a sin? That's just one more example of the Christians making something dirty, when it's really perfectly natural.

Take Care,
The Bablatrice - who puts the fun in fundamentalist slammer.

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