July 31, 2010

Holy Fucking Shit!!!

I have been blogging about Jesus sightings for almost 4 years. Jesus has shown up for people all across the world, but never for me. No matter how much I begged and pleaded and offered him blowjobs, Jesus has been just a total bitch about me seeing him.

Until now.

Yesterday I found Jesus. Did you hear that people? I FUCKING FOUND JESUS! I am so excited I'm damn near speechless!

It turns out Jesus has been waiting for me in a cemetery up in a tree. I can't disclose the location for fear that Jesus will be overrun with people wanting to touch his tree or carve chunks out of it to take home with them.

Unlike most of the other Jesus sightings, I don't have to even circle or outline or draw arrows to where Jesus is. You know what this means? Jesus obviously loves me more than all of those other people and he's probably ready for his beej.





Hugs and big wet kisses,
Babs

3 comments:

  1. Ok, took me a while, but I found a face. Jesus has some odd skin tone problems

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  2. Yes I see Jesus, I want to go there and worship and pray to him, he's pointing to his feet, waiting for us to kiss his feet and unlatch his sandals in which I am unworthy to unlatch. I also see his mother Mary on the left, All hail Mary full of grace! There's also god's image behind jesus, but fuck him, what's he done lately?

    Not a damned thing!

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  3. SA - If you had more faith you could have spotted Jesus much easier.

    Steven - What, no holy ghost?

    ReplyDelete