I know some of you can remember back last fall when I was elated to have been released from therapy. Well, it turns out that if you don't share everything with your therapist then he can't diagnose you correctly. Then, you'll have a minor melt-down and your therapist will un-release you from therapy, and he'll give you a new diagnosis, and put you on a handful of meds, and he will beat you soundly.
Okay, that last part is a lie. That was also one impressively long run-on sentence.
I was recently diganosed with bipolar disorder. I wasn't very happy about it. I think PTSD should be enough of a mental disorder. I can't see any reason that I need two of the things. I was also a little embarrassed. As far as we've come concerning mental illness, there are still stigmas attached. Then I started thinking that if anyone else I knew was diagnosed as being bipolar I wouldn't think any differently about them other than the fact that they were bipolar. Then I started thinking about this blog post and what I was going to write. I thought that I should be serious about it because it wasn't going to help the image of mental disorders if I joked about it. But then I thought that if I was diagnosed with something else like cancer, I'd joke about it. It's just how I cope.
What I'm trying to say is that this diagnosis is obviously making me think way too fucking much.
Also, if you're in therapy tell your therapist EVERYTHING. No matter how weird or scary or crazy it seems to you. Let it all out. A friend of mine told me that you're only as sick as your secrets. He was right.
I'll leave you with what I guess should be my new theme song. I insist that each of you turn up the volume, get up and dance.
Mucho Amore,
Babs
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8 Comments:
Babs, way to open up!
My mom's got it...and I guess I have 7 of the test points, but you know, I think mental illness is over-rated. Thanks for talking about it...All my love, your empathic sensitive (doesn't that sound better than your PTSDfriend ;) (and your #1 Fan *~*)
Dammit I wanna be bipolar, two!
Dan - Gracias, mi amigo. <---It's Spanish. I'll explain later. Bwahahaha!
Diana - Okay. I'm starting to believe you're my long-lost twin sister. Not that I'm supposed to have one, but if I was - you'd be it, sister.
R - You're two funny.
I know several people (including a family member) who are bipolar. It may be more common than people realize. Still, it takes a lot of guts to open up like you did. Kudos to you.
I don't know anybody who is bipolar (or they haven't shared), but as I work with a bunch of engineers, I know exactly what you mean about the stigma of mental health/therapy.
I think I tell my therapist everything...sadly, the fucking insurance company thinks I've been going long enough and if I'm not better (nothing really wrong with me - just like having someone to whom I can tell everything w/o judgement), then I must need to see a psychiatrist and be put on meds.
I'm so pissed off. Of course, I haven't seen my therapist in two weeks and she's on vacation one more week, and I'm doing well, so maybe I don't need her anymore, but I will sure as hell miss her. Fucking insurance company standing between my therapist and me...I think I'd prefer the government. ;-)
Chappy - Thank you very much. That means a lot.
Kat - Oh god, I don't know what I'd do without my therapist. Seriously. I know one day I'll have to be weaned and I'm not looking forward to it.
Sorry for the use of the "F" word at your blog. I was just so pissed off (still am). They sent me a pamphlet in the mail on depression...yeah, because that's the ONLY reason people see a therapist.
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