January 5, 2007

Sightings

That Jesus Sho' Gets Around

A Milwaukee woman saw Jesus on a tree.

AND

Florida residents saw Jesus on a tree.

No nails were needed for either one.


Where will Jesus appear next? If Jesus should happen to appear on one of your trees, or on a rutabaga or such, please send me the picture. I will post it right here on Flumadiddle with your story, and you'll be famous. And rich beyond your wildest dreams. And yes, Fwig, I'll accept images of Calvin.

An Extremely Rare Sighting That is so Rare it's Not Seen Very Often. At All! Hardly Ever!


Thomas: You're not going to believe this.
Me: What?
Thomas: I SAW CHURCH SIGN GUY!!!
Me: No way.
Thomas: Yeah, just as he was putting the finishing touches on the sign.
Me: Did you take his picture?
Thomas: Oh fuck! Why didn't I think of that?

I think it's better that we don't have a photo of church sign guy. I'm sure that all of you have your own idea of what he looks like, and I don't want that to be spoiled.


I think we should just embrace our own image of church sign guy and feel the love. Feel the church sign guy love. Doesn't that feel good?

I think I just lowered myself to level creepy.

Take Care,
The Bablatrice - who is going to do a quick lord-check on all her trees tomorrow.

7 comments:

  1. I saw Jesus on my desk at work. He was next to the Sippy Cups I use to drink Vodka from:

    http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c66/Eeeeekkk/SippyCups.jpg

    UNC Prof, it's called EDITING. If you can't say it in a paragraph, don't post it as a comment. Your pompous, ignorant, long-winded masturbatory ramblings do not impress anyone. I suggest you go back to community college and try to finish up your G.E.D.

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  2. Dearest Unc-Professor, I love the smiling bobble-headed jackass that is your logo. Artist's perception or really you?

    I checked out the house of horrors you call your blog. It has all the charm of a dead conjoined twin.

    There's so much to say regarding the massive list of absurdities you've collected but I don't want to burden you with a level of thinking so vastly beyond your capability.

    But it's great to see that half-wits are getting out and about and taking pride in their perceived superiority and vomiting up humongous reams of dialogue - mostly stolen - and some their own - with every third word awkwardly and randomly replaced by thesaurus so as to make themselves seem intelligent in the eyes of other half-wits and nothing short of hysterically funny in the eyes of thinking men like myself.

    Because what can we do but laugh?

    Eh?

    When you freaks beyond freakdom, bearers of a charade called religon - 99% shareholder of all the world's hate and war and death and pain - who come preaching about heaven without grasping that the only paradise is this ruined paradise - this earth that is ruined by religon - what else can we do but boil with outrage? We can look upon the comic stupidity of it all - and laugh.

    Those are my thoughts. No plagiarism. No thesaurus. Why don't you go amalgamate them with something... LOL...

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  3. Eeeeekkk - Wow! That image of Jesus may be the best I've seen. It will be posted here very, very soon.

    What can I say about your response to the Professor? You used masturbatory and it is one of my favorite words. And "masturbatory ramblings" is just fabulous. Thank you.

    Fwig - Oh my. Words fail me. Your response was brilliant. By the time I got to "why don't you go amalgamate with something" I couldn't breathe. Thank you.

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  4. Glad I could be of assistance. FWIG was definitely far more eloquent than I. My hat's off to him.

    This is what happens when I drunk-post at 3 AM. :-)

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  5. My response was indulgent. Eeeeekkk's was concise and relevant. Regardless, I'm just glad to be on the same team as you cool kids! Have you read Eeeeek's blog yet? It's extremely witty. Another brilliant find.

    Isn't this always the way though? You put a nice little dinner party together and everyone's getting along fine and then some dirty bird flies through the window and poops in the pudding. The nerve!

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  6. I have read Eeeeekkk's blog and I enjoy it muchly.

    The nerve indeed! I really don't mind the preaching, but he could have been a little more brief with it. "You're going to hell. I'm not. Haha."

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  7. WAIT FWIG! Don't stop reading yet. I forgot to say, "Happy Birthday". A day late, but I'm singing to you right now this very instant.

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